Nadigaiyar Thilagam

Do you love watching good movies? Are you a fan of Indian regional movies that were released between the ‘50s & the ‘70s? Have you adored the black & white epics? Do you still think those were the golden days of Indian celluloid? Do you still fascinate the graceful women who portrayed simple and tough roles equally impressively, who looked like angels even in  black & white contours, who did not have references and encyclopaedia or Googles and YouTube or Wikipedia to look up to learn the nuances of acting? Do you want to relive all of these in a span of 180 minutes?

Watch #Mahanati (Telugu) or #NadigaiyarThilagam (Tamil). Watch history being recreated. Watch how technical movies of those years have been in spite of technology itself not being so advanced. Watch how Telugu filmmakers have always been advanced in movie making not just in the recent Bahubali but ever since the 50s in Mayabazar.

This is one movie that gives you the experience of watching many legendary old movie clippings all in one. Period film and hence a huge challenge as always with such films. Absolutely stunningly made. Every detail is attended to. Art Director - #Avinash, brings the old Madras of the 50s straight thru to 80s right in front of our eyes. The roads, studios, buses, trams, rickshaws, jhutkas, telephones, radios, TV sets - every single prop is remarkably recreated. Kudos to #IndrakshiPattnaik, the costume stylist. Perfect costumes including small details in the costumes including those that of bystanders and passers by, let alone for the main casts. Make up and hair do, especially for the lead casts, fabulous job!

#KeerthySuresh - take a bow, Lady! Plum role 🤢 Savithri was one of the bests in the field. In fact, even till date, there are not many performers who can pull off the array of roles that she has brought out in those times. Almost each of her blockbuster roles were recreated by Keerthy. What a huge risk she has taken! The best part is, the risk is rewarded amply. Keerthy does not just look Savithri. Keerthy has lived Savithri in every frame of the film.  I had goosebumps seeing her on screen replicating Savithri’s scintillating performance in Maya Bazar! It felt Keerthy was obsessed with Savithri’s spirit, if that was possible. Watch it to believe it.

#Dulquer - tricky role. It’s the kind - “damned if you did, damned if you don’t” types. Finely essayed by Dulquer. He has done it so neatly and perfectly. He oozes romance and aptly recreates the magic that Gemini once did! His subtle portrayal in some places adds to the weight of the scene.

#KotagiriVenkateswaraRao, editor - marvellous job of switching between colour and black & white. Still leaves me awed!

#AshwinNag - one needs a lot of conviction to do such films. The director has loads of it. Could have been more careful in representing some facts without dramatising or adding fictional elements for commercialism. Casting of Samantha is a disaster. And the person who dubbed for her in Tamil, adds to the irritation. But these can be tolerated only because his focus and output of the mainstream was terrific. Astounding job!

Do watch in theatres and live the golden era, yet again!

102 Not Out

How interesting could a story be when only 3 men, 2 of which are beyond 70 (or more), are featured in it? Dry? Sleepy? Boring? Nope. All credits to the story teller (Saumya Joshi) and director (Umesh Shukla) for making this “102 Not Out”, as interesting, emotional and funny, as they could. And yes it is so relevant to today’s times. 

Amitji - what a phenomenon he is! The scene in which he narrates the way his bahu dies, is so touching. His dialogue delivery, expressions, body language and every aspect of his performance is so remarkable! I am sure this will go as one of his best performances till date. 

Rishi Kapoor has played along very well. The beautiful chemistry between them makes the audience smile to themselves and also laugh at a few places. 

The 3rd character is also fitting in so well. Jimit Trivedi - Is he a theatre artist? Checked Google. Of course, he is! If you know what I mean, we can understand what he is made of from just this one movie. Subtle but strong performer! Kudos. 

No glamour. No lady cast just for that purpose. No song and dance. It is just a “real” life story. 

Overall, a must watch for every Indian. I now feel that I must have taken my mom out more boldly than fearing her poor health all the time. But hey! One of the conditions laid down in the story is not to worry. So let me try! 😊

Wishes, wishes!

The person who made my dream come true - my mother! But not for her broad mindedness, her grit to convince my staunch, orthodox father, her unconditional and selfless love for me, I could not have possibly imagined my wedding with Jayan, my sweetheart! She stood by me like a rock in every life-changing decision that I took and blessed me wholeheartedly for all success, always! My special days never start until I get to hear her wish me. Wish she was around to wish!

Sleep Talking!

Sleep talking

The whole extended family used to gather around when my mother occasionally decides to take an afternoon nap. As she slips into deep slumber, my uncle would ask her, “Manni, where did you keep the left over Upma?”  After a few seconds my mother would blabber in her sleep, “I kept it in the bureau”. And all others sitting around would chuckle. Then the next question. “Where is the new dress?”  She would say, “ Check the fridge”. Another round of chuckles. 

These kind of Q&A were a regular feature in our family when we were children. And once she wakes up we would narrate the whole thing and she would also laugh with us without taking offence of being teased. What a sport!

Much later when Parkinson’s took over, she would imagine many things and say that there are people waiting outside our house, police has come to investigate, press is also waiting, some burglar in the house, someone trying to hit her or kill her, so on and so forth. My brother and family (including the children) would play along and make her feel comfortable every single time she went off into these hallucinations. 

The last few days of hers’, she would talk about my brother arguing with my hubby. She would imagine that The Lord’s procession is on its way and she asked me to get her ready quickly.  She saw things which we did not see. She talked to people who were long gone. In our stupid hopeful minds, all the irrelevant talking and babbling of hers’ were interpreted as hallucinations of Parkinson’s.  We did not think it could be her memory slipping back and forth. She answered a few questions correctly. But when quizzed about what she had for breakfast, she told the doc, “2 puris with sugar and curd rice”. And went on to tell why sugar and why not any potato dish for the sides. In reality she had with much struggle had eaten hardly 2 idlis. In fact I joked with her asking her if the idlis I made tasted like puris! On a different day, she would have laughed at my wit. But this time it struck her that she indeed had idlis that I had fed her and then fell silent. 

Memories, thoughts, ideas, imaginations, creativity - formed the basis of her last few days of sleep talking! Something that we teased her for, became the reason for our tears!! When will I know what she actually went through in her mind!

I am alright!

I am alright!

This is what my mother said whenever we asked her, “How are you, ma?” 

Even as a child, I recall how many times my mom had to get hospitalised either because she was dehydrated or anemic. In those times, we didn’t realise the gravity of the poor health of our parents. We were so much in oblivion and to ourselves. We knew that she will soon be doing her 18 hour chores. When we heard her respond to people checking on her health, she would always say, “I am alright!”  For a 10th Grader, her accent in English and her style of saying that with conviction, will even make the doctor attending on her think, “Does she really have a problem!”

As we grew to be teenagers and college-goers, we did not have the time to ask her how she was. Children are selfish. They don’t realise what their parents have to go through to see them achieve their goals. She did fall sick but since we were sure she will be “alright”, we had no worries. 

Time flew! We all got married off and went our ways. My brother and she lived a simple & peaceful life  in Mumbai. She found a simpler daughter-in-law who remained her biggest blessing all her life. What we daughters did not know was how much my mom missed her hubby who she had lost to kidney failure even when he was just 58! We thought she had a peaceful life with my brother and was strong to tide over any grief. When we used to call her rarely and ask about her well-being, the same response, “I’m alright!”

Six years ago she came back to Chennai with my brother and family and stayed only a couple of kms away from me. She was affected by Parkinson’s and we did not know what was in store for us. But every 6-8 months she had some health challenge and was admitted to the hospital, she would always smile and say, “I’m alright!”

The first time in all my memory of her, she never said, “I’m alright” was when she had decided to leave this world. A few weeks back she had a bout of low sugar episodes. She got hospitalised. She was in the hospital for 6 days exactly. I tried asking her in many different ways how she’s coping. Not once did I hear her say, “I’m alright!”  I knew intuitively that this is ominous. It has never happened. Something is wrong. And all my fears were justified when the doctor declared her dead on 1st of April. She did not fool us by saying she’s alright. She did not deceive us by giving false hopes. She knew she was NOT ALRIGHT. When will we see her again and ask her, “How are you, ma?”

The light of my life!

Bright red bindi on her forehead. Tinkling, gleaming eyes. Diamond nose-rings shining on her beautiful, sharp nose. Well structured teeth always smiling. Simple saree clad. Neatly combed hair, though scanty, made into a nice bun. Active and hyper active are the only two states that we have seen of her until her last few days. 

Super independent. Boss. Coach. Mentor. Problem solver. Lyricist. Vocalist. Veena player. Composer. Music Teacher. Daughter. Sister. Wife. Daughter-in-law, Sister-in-law. Mother. Grand Mother. Cook. Washerwoman. Cleaner. 

One of my deep rooted fears got busted on 1st of April. One of my many plans worked well. 

Giving up opportunities outside India was more to be with our parents and siblings. When parents aged, my conviction to continue our stay in India/Chennai increased. But as luck would have neither my father nor Jayan’s had us by their sides on their last days. So I was questioning myself why did we even choose to be here! Felt very unfortunate when we were at the receiving end of the news of their demise. 

As though to reconcile for all that, my mother dearest, had all her 3 children by her side in her last 6 days of life in the hospital. None us were traveling. None of us had anything that kept us away from her. We took turns to be by her side. And we were with her almost until she breathed her last. All 6 of her grand children were next to her. 

And her dearest daughter-in-law did not move from her side even when her 3 children kept coming in and going out. Her dedication and devotion to her mother-in-law is immeasurable. She cleaned her, administered her medicines like a thorough nurse and fed her like her own child. A solid example for how goodness begets goodness. 

Though we kept hoping she would come back home, something kept telling us, maybe not!? None of us could see her suffer so much. The tremor, her hallucinations, her restlessness, her mouth ulcers, her babbling and singing and non stop talking, her inability to even sit up by herself, her inability to recognise some of our relatives....we could not bear to see this!

At one point I did say either she comes back home in a better state of health or she dies gracefully. After all, she had had her quota of life seeing her children get settled and her grand children doing well. She had had her quota of karma in every possible way. Then why put her through this trouble?

God listened to the second part of my prayers. He liked the or clause. Unfortunate us! Nothing can replace a mother. Nothing can replace a woman so strong willed, exceptionally intelligent, abundantly talented, outrageously kind hearted. Nothing can replace my Amma!